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  • Plateaus are the highest form of flattery.
    Peace,
    Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
    (But you can call me Joe)

    Comment


    • Started dating a girl that works at the zoo. She's a keeper.
      Peace,
      Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
      (But you can call me Joe)

      Comment


      • I called the incontinence hotline..
        They asked, "Can you hold please?"
        Peace,
        Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
        (But you can call me Joe)

        Comment


        • Read a poem one day while sittin’ on the ceramic throne called Brown Spots On The Wall. Believe the author to be Hu Flun Pu

          Comment


          • Toilet humor is not my favorite, but it's a solid #2.
            Peace,
            Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
            (But you can call me Joe)

            Comment


            • The only way I could love my wife more is if she was wrapped in bacon.
              Peace,
              Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
              (But you can call me Joe)

              Comment


              • I saw a nun walking aimlessly around the neighborhood. Probably a roamin' catholic.
                Peace,
                Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                (But you can call me Joe)

                Comment


                • I wish I could trust my stairs, but they're always up to something.
                  Peace,
                  Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                  (But you can call me Joe)

                  Comment


                  • I have a chicken proof lawn. It's impeccable.
                    Peace,
                    Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                    (But you can call me Joe)

                    Comment


                    • I've been told that being a vampire sucks.
                      Peace,
                      Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                      (But you can call me Joe)

                      Comment


                      • Show me a pharmacist and I'll show you a piller of the community.
                        Peace,
                        Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                        (But you can call me Joe)

                        Comment


                        • My wife likes it when I blow air on her when she's hot, but honestly, I'm not a fan.
                          Peace,
                          Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                          (But you can call me Joe)

                          Comment


                          • My wife left me because I'm a problem gambler. Now all I can think of is how to win her back.
                            Peace,
                            Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                            (But you can call me Joe)

                            Comment


                            • I married Way Too Young. She's Chinese.
                              Peace,
                              Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                              (But you can call me Joe)

                              Comment


                              • Just walked through the dining hall on an aircraft carrier. What a mess!
                                Peace,
                                Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                                (But you can call me Joe)

                                Comment


                                • I got a new job as an executioner. I'll beheading there shortly.
                                  Peace,
                                  Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                                  (But you can call me Joe)

                                  Comment


                                  • Why is abbreviation such a long word?
                                    Peace,
                                    Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                                    (But you can call me Joe)

                                    Comment


                                    • Show me a milk man wearing high heels and I'll show you a dairy queen.
                                      Peace,
                                      Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                                      (But you can call me Joe)

                                      Comment


                                      • Parallel lines have so much in common. It's a shame that they'll never meet.
                                        Peace,
                                        Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                                        (But you can call me Joe)

                                        Comment


                                        • Reconnecting an electrical circuit is revolting.
                                          Peace,
                                          Baron Wilhelm Gustav von Schmidt III
                                          (But you can call me Joe)

                                          Comment

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